Monday, April 4, 2011

Startin' a Tweeter Thing

Yee Haw Y'all.

It's been 4 years since my last post. Been busy helping do things like eliminate tobacco control programs in New Jersey and cripple programs in New York. Next big project will be to help out some good ole boys in their fight against the Revenue men. Heck we're just like the Dukes of Hazzard, only instead of the General Lee, we drive lung cancer rates. Yeeee Ha! Good times.

Anywho, figured I'd jump back into the world of Interwebs and start one of them Tweeter accounts everybody is so keen on.

Y'all can follow me at @BigTobaccoFan01


Wednesday, December 19, 2007

RJ Reynold Christmas Playboy Promotion

In the imortal words of Andy Williams, "it's the holiday season, so So hoopdidoo and dickoreedock." Fortunately the good folks at RJ Reynolds haven't forgotten with their brand spankin' new (emphasis on spankin') Holiday-time promotion.


Got this in the ol' inbox just in time for Christmas!

This year you can get that special someone a free subscription to Playboy. Camel is puttin' the ho back in holidays as part of the effort to get y'all hooked ...uh...enjoyin' new Camel Wides.

After all is there any better way to honor the rededication of the Second Temple in Jerusalem or the birth of Jesus than kickin' back with a Camel Wide, thumbin' through a nudie mag and reading about how Ms. December likes sea turtles and long walks on the beach?

To me, that sums up the Holiday season. The heck with yer bell ringin' Santas, and yer family get togethers and the like.

Skin rags and smokes. That's a holday fer me! Yeeee haaaaawwww!

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Clubbin' Camels: AG Suit Hits RJR for Rolling Stone spread

Poor ol' Joe Camel can't get a break.

Today, a total of eight busy-body attorneys general have filed lawsuits claimin' Reynold and Camel violated the Master's Settlement Agreement with a big ad campaign in Rollin' Stone magazine. It's all the usual suspects of California, Connecticut, Illinois, New York, Ohio, Maryland, Maine and Washington.

Y'all can read about it here, here, and here as well as about a zillion other places on the web.

So what's all the hub bub about? Camel has already pulled the ads down but thanks to the health nuts over at the Campaign fer Tobacco Free Kids we can still check them out.


Personally I don't see a thing wrong with them, but then again I still can't abide that them government folks made Reynolds drop a perfectly good spokescamel like Joe.

But here's the argument the government types and the health nuts are makin'. It all revolved around that big Master's Settlement Agreement.

Fer them folks that don't remember that's the big lawsuit that allowed local governments to sue the tobacco companies so they could fund important projects like buyin' golf carts fer local courses and government subsidies of tobacco producers.


See the problem is this. Accordin' to that agreement Reynolds sent Joe Camel packin' and vowed never to use cartoons in their advertisin' again.

Well shoot, there may be a couple of cartoons in those ads but it ain't like they got Shrek and Donkey sharin' a pipe or somethin'. Perspective people. That's all I'm askin' fer.


People are losin' focus in this whole debate. Y'all need to ask what these ads are really about.

Music, my friends, music. Independent grassroots honest to goodness music.

Clearly Reynolds has shown they're a company with a big heart and - I'm sorry maybe I just ain't cynical enough - but to me the only thing Camel wants to do is support the arts.

I mean it's in Rollin' Stone. Ain't that one of them newspaper magazines fer music types? Why else in the world would a company like Reynolds possibly want to advertise in a magazine that caters to a musically inclined hip crowd between the ages of 18 and 24 with a modest disposable income?

It's all about the music.

And, I'll be frank, I'm not sure I like the idea of a bunch of city slicker attorneys general tryin' to deprive kids of music.
Did we learn nothin' from Mr. Holland's Opus!?!

America the time has come to put the breaks on these music hatin' health zealots. Like it or not, kids are gonna smoke.
And do you really want them kids to smoke while they're listenin' to corporate bubble gum pop?
Camel is providin' our youth with a choice. Givin' our kids the opportunity to smoke while listenin' to their favorite undiscovered new rock alternative.
And choice is what America is about my friend.

Kudos to Camel. Yer talkin' a beatin' but yer doin' right by our future customers...uh...I mean...kids.

Monday, November 12, 2007

Poll: Women Keep Smokin' To Keep Thin

This week is the annual American Cancer Society Great American Smokeout. So expect to hear a lot of gobbly guck about how bad smokin' is fer ya. This is like Christmas to them heath nuts.

Makes me sick.

I am so tired of hearin' about how terrible smokin' is fer ya. Nobody ever talks about the real benefits of tobacco and smokin'. It's all lung cancer this and emphysimia that. Blah blah blah. What about the economic benefits? What about the health benefits? What about all the great advances big tobacco companies (like my beloved Liardare Tobacco)?

In the words of legendary 1990's philosopher Susan Powder, "Stop the Insanity."

So, to counter act this so-called Smokeout, I'm gonna provide y'all with a little bit of truth. Truth you won't read elsewhere (except on the news sites that originally post the stories I link to).

Take this story fer example. It's from the Earth Times, which sounds like a very important name fer a newspaper. Accordin' to the story a new poll out shows women are afriad to quit smokin' because they might gain weight.

The study was done by a lil' phillie named Cindy Pomerleau who's some sort of book worm at the University of Michigan. Apparently she's done a whole bunch of research on the topic. Her work is great, but unfortunately it looks like the health nuts got to her too. All of her conclusions are of the "smokin' is bad fer ya" ilk.

Consider a couple of things Pomerleau found:

  • 75 percent of women smokers were unwillin' to gain more than 2.25 kg if they quit smokin'

  • Nearly 50 percent were unwillin' to gain any weight at all

  • While there are many reasons why some women don't quit smokin', fear of weight-gain is high on the list

  • many women began smokin' because they believed it would help 'em stay thin

Ya see folks nicotine is a natural appetite suppressant. That means smokin' makes it so y'all ain't hungry. Some folks also say smokin' burns 200 calories per day. Of course much of the same thing could be said about heroin but never mind that.


So at the end of the day, y'all can jump on yer treadmills or yer stair masters or - if yer smart like me - y'all can just light up six or eight packs of unfiltered goodness. Same difference. Besides if yer smokin' six or eight packs a day, then a treadmill or StairMaster is probably the last place in the world y'all want to be.


Now I think this is really an opportunity that we're missin' here. Tobacco should begin marketin' itself and cross brandin' with the diet industry. Just imagine it: Slim Fast Lights, Atkins 100's, South Beach Signature Blends. Trust me folks I am on to somethin' here and my friends in big tobacco ought to be payin' attention.


There's an obesity epidemic in this country and big tobacco can be part of the solution. Offer fat kids cigarettes. Yer a new mom tryin' to loose weight, here's a free pack of Lucky's. There's lots of stuff like that we could do.


Why are we, as an industry, cedin' the heath argument to health groups? Just cause the got doctors and research and credentials and science and common sense and such don't mean they need to win that part of the debate.


Besides, you know what we got that they ain't got? A big pile of money. And if we got to spend every last dime to convince people that smokin' can be fun and healthy then we sure ought to!

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

iPhone offered as prize by Cancer Society in YouTube Contest

Well don't this just beat all.

Hot off the heels of last month's encouragin' article about YouTube bein' a safe haven fer tobacco companies lookin' to get the word out, we get this from the mamby pambies at the American Cancer Society and their Great American Smokeout video contest.



Personally I find it a might disgraceful that them American Cancer folks are buttin' in on the party over at YouTube. It's been said that "www" means "wild wild west" that means we got us a a safe place to spread the word without hassles like this from health nuts. Oh and there weren't no iPhones nor Cancer Societies nor Smokeyouts in the wild wild west. So what the heck is they doin' on my YouTubey.

And the fact they're usin' an iPhone as first prize stinks three ways to Sunday as well. I guess the deal is, they want ya'll to post a short video - under a minute long - tellin' folks why they shouldn't smoke. In the words of a slack jawed Gen-Xer, whatever. They got all their rules and such posted here at their new antismokin' site.

Sounds like an easy way to get one of them iPhones or an iPod but I won't be enterin'. I ain't sellin' out. My integrity and my retirement package from Liardare are worth 10 times one of them iPhones.

So y'all can enter, an win yer iPhone or yer iPods but I'm stickin' to my principles. Stick that in yer pipe and...well....do whatever you non-smokin' types do with pipes.

Friday, September 28, 2007

Pro Smoking ads on YouTube

Check this out from the ABC of Australia.  Apparently tobacco companies are findin' a new home on YouTube.  Good fer them.

Pro-smoking 'ads' target youth market on YouTube

by youth affairs reporter Michael Turtle

Posted Fri Sep 28, 2007 6:48am AEST

Over the years, governments have slowly restricted the ways that cigarettes can be marketed - so perhaps it's not surprising that new technologies are being brought into the fray.

Although the tobacco companies deny it, one leading anti-smoking academic accuses them of using websites like YouTube to reach a younger client base.

'Smoking equals fun' reads the title of one video.

Another one is called 'Nice day for a girl to have a smoke'.

A simple search on YouTube brings up dozens of items, apparently glamorising cigarettes.

"Here's a cigarette and a lighter which is all we need to perform the trick and see who's gonna win the bet," one video says.

Professor Simon Chapman from Sydney University's School of Public Health says tobacco companies are turning to the web to attract young people.

He says the videos and the online forums do not generally look like ads, but they do promote the idea of smoking.

"People standing around talking about how wonderful it is to smoke, how anti-smoking laws should be disobeyed," he said.

"A lot of soft porn-style messages, the scantily clad women smoking cigarettes and showing how you should hold a cigarette, that sort of thing."

Figures show that smoking amongst young people is at its lowest level since surveys started, at just under 20 per cent of 17-year-olds.

But Professor Chapman is worried that the good work of anti-smoking campaigns could be undone by ambush marketing online.

"You can see how many of these have been watched because they have web counters on them," he said.

"You can see the number of downloads and you can see the number of kids responding to them and saying yeah, wow, great cool, you know go for it, I love smoking, this sort of thing.

"If I were in the tobacco industry I'd be working overtime to make sure those clips are out there in a large variety of ways, and it looks like they're doing that."

The tobacco industry says it is very hard to stop people uploading videos or talking about topics on the internet.

Nerida White from cigarette company Philip Morris says the online videos have nothing to do with the firm's marketing tactics.

"We don't use the web to advertise or promote our products or smoking at all," she said.

"And we don't think people should be able to advertise or promote tobacco on the internet."

Regardless of who is creating the content, there are calls for it to be regulated.

Quit Victoria spokeswoman Suzie Stillman wants the Federal Government to tighten restrictions, to try to bring the internet into line with other forms of media.

"The Commonwealth could look at ways in which internet content hosts and internet service providers could be required to take down or block access to certain material if it contravenes tobacco advertising legislation," she said.

Govt concerned

Federal Communications Minister Helen Coonan says she is worried by the reports.

She has announced that the Government will look into the issue, to see if the internet is already covered by current legislation, or if it needs to be updated.

"We may have to actually broaden the definition of publication," she said.

"At the moment it's prohibited if it's in a document, if it appears in a film or a radio program or it's put in a public place. There's some argument about whether it's specific to the internet."

But the internet can also be used for positive messages.

Ms Stillman points out that there are also a number of anti-smoking messages on the web.

"We can promote anti-smoking information. We can promote non-smoking images in the same way as I suppose they're being promoted on the other side," she said.

In fact, one ad that shows mouth cancer as a consequence of smoking has already been viewed more than 150,000 times online.

The anti-smoking lobby has described the new online landscape as the battleground for the lungs of our youth.

And if it's a war that's beginning, the Quit campaign is prepared to fight back.

 

Monday, September 10, 2007

Stupid Tragic Ironies

Stumbled across this over at YouTube. Remember when we had the post Danny Thomas a couple months back. Well here's another smarty paints video on legendary action star Steve McQueen.